I love the little boys at the orphanages where we work. This last week we have been focusing on painting murals on the barren walls of the preschool and special Ed rooms. These rooms are rather dull and drab and have very old wallpaper as a boarder falling off the walls. We started on the preschool room which is actually a big room with a ton of beds, a few cribs, and no toys. As we began cleaning the walls the curious preschoolers would come in and question what we gringos were doing and why all of the beds were in the middle of the room. They were so excited to help and we discovered that, Christopher, a 6 year old there has an amazing talent. He can sing like it is nobody’s business. I have a video of him singing his heart out as we finished the mural of a barnyard in the preschool. The mural turned out wonderful and we are all pretty proud of ourselves. I am especially proud of the pig because that was that first thing I have ever drawn in my life and it looks really good.

I am afraid that I going to forget everything that has happened here. There have been so many good experiences but at the end of the day I can’t muster up the energy to write them down in my Journal. There are so many things about this place that I love. I love the beautiful trees and mountains, I love the pupusarias on every corner, I love the tired old people who sit on the same street every day with the same expression selling the same bracelets or candies, or whatever you need really. Mostly I love all of the different kinds of people I meet every day. I am now sitting listening to our 30 something year old friend Carlos talk to another volunteer out on the patio. He is quite the character. He is a communist who LOVES Mic Jagger and The Who. He says he lived in San Francisco for years but he doesn’t speak a word of English. …..well except for the English he’s learned from listening to the Beatles. He says he did drugs in San Francisco, which is rather apparent by his jittery movements and comments. He has a crush on me and is constantly asking me if I have a boyfriend or to take weird pictures or if he can see my “bootiful, bootiful” hair because I often have it up in a ponytail. He comes over every night to play us his favorite oldies and in the morning he stops by to pick up anyone who would like to go running. He is quite the experience in himself.

Happy Birthday to one of the greatest men I know!

Today is the birthday of a very special man. My Dad is.....well to put it simply, Amazing! I am so grateful for the blessing of being taught and loved by this man as I grew up. My father has gone through some very hard experiences in his life as he grew up in a broken home in Las Vegas Nevada, and I am so impressed at the great man he has become. Among his strengths listed is being a great father. Through out my life I have always been close to my father and I have learned so much from him. I have learned to always do my best and then go the extra mile. I learned that we serve because we love people and if they need help we give it. I have watched my father love people regardless of who they were and what they had done to him and I have tried, not always succeeding, to model my life after his example. My father has taught me about the gospel and the blessings that come from living my life as close to the savior that I can. I could go on and on about who he is and how wonderful he is. He has tried his best to teach me so many things. I am definitely a slow learner and have a long way to go before I can hope to have some of the qualities my father has.

Out of all of my daddy's accomplishments his greatest is that I have never doubted and always known that he loves me (and the rest of his children) more then anything else in his life. I am so grateful for a father who knows that I am imperfect and still loves me. Many times I have felt very humbled by my mistakes and imperfections and I am so grateful that I have always been able to return to my father's loving and open arms, and then hear how much he loves me and always will. I think that I have learned more about my Heavenly Father's love through my earthly fathers example then any other experience.

Daddy thank you so much for teaching and loving me and helping me become who I am today. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

EFY

Dear Sister,
Well I just got back from two of the most amazing weeks of my life! Being an EFY Counselor at Southern Virginia University was definitely a wonderful experience! I learned so much! I got there pretty anxious and nervous about the great trust the parents of these children were placing in me, as they dropped their precious teenagers off Monday morning expecting me to send them home spiritually fed and full of wonderful life changing experiences. Me, the girl who can't even make a straight face for a picture was supposed to do that.

I thought back on my experiences as a participant at EFY and became very excited for the weeks to begin. Sunday night I got the names of my girls and I was told who my co-counselors would be. I was originally in a three some but Monday morning a counselor who had been stranded at the airport for two days showed up and I was reassigned to him! When I got the list of names for the girls who would soon be my shadows for the next week I was amazed by how I instantly fell in love with them and I had never even met them!


Week one was amazing! Windows of heaven was so unified and excited to learn about the gospel. I was floored by how much these 16-18 year old girls looked up to me and listened to every word I said and were always watching. They opened up to me and shared things that I was amazed to hear them Sharing. It was one of the most amazing things Wednesday night when during my devotional I asked about the promptings they had been receiving that week from the spirit and for the next 20 minutes I got nonstop experiences and heart felt testimonies. I am so grateful for the power of prayer and the hand that heavenly father has in our lives. I kept telling the girls that Heavenly Father puts people in our lives for a purpose and to answer our prayers and it was am amazing testimony to me as I watched these girls lift and rally around each other to get through the VERY tough things that were going on in their lives!



The boys that week were daring too. I was amazed by how strong they were in the gospel and how willing and eager they were to honor their priesthood and the sanctity of womanhood.



My Co-counselor and I had so much fun with these kids and we really learned to love them like they were family. It was great to be able to watch them learn and grow and to send them home with a knowledge that their Heavenly Father knew who they were and loved them very much!



The second week I met with my new co-counselor (they change every week) and was so excited to repeat week 1 again. Boy was I in for an awakening! It proved to be the most taxing and difficult week I had had in a while. It was actually full of learning and growth, for which I am very grateful. About half of my girls the second week had trouble realizing why there were rules at EFY and the other half had never been and were not getting the wonderful EFY experience that every one raved about. I couldn't help but feel that it was primarily my fault because I let myself get to caught up in being the police of the operation.



They were beautiful girls and it was wonderful to get to Thursday and hear their sweet testimonies and how they had grown that week because it wasn't as apparent as the week before. I am so grateful that Heavenly Father knew that I am not perfect and created ways for the girls who needed help I could not give to receive that help.



As for the boys of the second week they were wonderful young men who were definitely growing and learning in the gospel. It was great to hear the ones who I could tell the first day did not have the rock solid testimony of who they were bare testimony that they had felt the spirit that week and knew that Heavenly Father was their father and "that Joesph Smith saw whatever he said he saw."



The "Fishers" taught me so much about the power of prayer and faith as I found myself on my knees at every opportunity pleading with the lord to help me find some way to get through to his precious children and show them how much I loved them!

It ended up being a wonderful experience. One that I have walked away from with many new friends and treasuring with my most precious memories.

Super Nanny to the rescue!

Dear Sister,
I am having quite the opportunity this week! For the past 2 and a half days I have been babysitting/house sitting the two most adorable children while their parents are in London. At first I was a little anxious and apprehensive because you know all about my past experience doing this kind of work. I babysat two little boys who were 5 and 2 years old. I had late nights of screaming about going to bed, nail polish ALL OVER the bathroom, I was punched and kicked and yelled at over not giving the boys they right spoon and by the time the week was over and the parent had come home I was out that door quicker then you can say bob's your uncle! It was a house where only super nanny would be able to fix the problems they had! We've both had experiences like that.
That was about three and a half years ago and I've changed my mind but I still had my apprehensions and all those memories came flooding back after I accepted this job and realized what i had actually done. I showed up Monday night, their mother ran over their daily routine with me, and she and her husband were off to England. Can I just tell you these are two of the greatest kids in the world! Oh my goodness they are complete opposites to the boys I described before. They eat all of their food, and clear the table before they leave, and they go to bed without any fuss by 7:30!!!!! WOW. I've been taking the younger boy on outings with me while her sister is at school and it has been so much fun! As I am writing this he is sitting quietly next to me building a train set. They remind me of how much fun we had as children! I am so grateful we had such an amazing mother! I am actually now looking forward to getting married, having children and being a mother to kids that are hopefully as great as these kids are! Their parents would never need super nanny here!

growing up

Dear Sister,
I told myself I was going to go to bed about 30 minutes ago. I am so exhausted and I know that I am going to hate myself in the morning because of my lack of sleep. I was thinking about friends from Silverado and how they were doing. Particularly Emily McGowan. Do you remember her? It breaks my heart to think of my friends who are so dear to me, and yet who I haven't kept in contact with. Most of them I put so much of me into being their friend and I just want the absolute best for them. Sister Spencer told me Will Tyson is inactive. I am so sad. HA do you remember him? Probably not as much as I do but I used to have a crush on him. I was such a funny boy crazy little girl.

I went to a great fireside tonight. It was about preparing for missions and although it didn't apply to me it was wonderful! I am always realizing things that I need to do better! Sister, some of my favorite people spoke. Craig C. for example. But It was great to hear about his mission and I had a thought that he may actually be a decent person now. It don't think that he and I will ever be best friends but I am......I don't quite know how to articulate it. I am learning to let go of the resentment I had for him for so long and for really no good reason. It's great to grow up and get over yourself.

Now that it is so late I am going to say good night and go write to our brother.

Muah!

My Rock

Well,
Due to comments from my sister, I am sitting here staring at the screen trying to write a blog. I opened this blog mostly intending to be a replacement for my myspace account I canceled because it was controlling my life! I felt that it was taking to much of my time and energy that desperately needed to be used on other things......like homework. Now I feel that Homework is controlling my life and I am not taking the time to keep up this blog to my sister's satisfaction.

So my Dear Sister,

I am taking a break to write just for you! I don't know what I will say because I am not as deep and thoughtful as you are at this time. I feel that my thoughts are always consumed with worry about how I am going to get everything done that I need to and still fit in work, Church, and sleep. I've decided that I need to become more disciplined. Satan really does know how to get me too! Whenever he wants to get me to not focus on what I need to he always throws a boy in the mix! LOL What is my problem Sister?

In my struggle to keep my head above water this semester with school, getting money for El Salvador, training and preparing for El Salvador, Working, Fulfilling my calling, getting ready for EFY, boys, and etc, I have had some deep thoughts and learned a few things. Sister, I am really trying hard to better myself and become the woman that Heavenly Father wants me to be, but even thinking of that really makes me overwhelmed! I start to think of that on top of everything else and it makes me want to lay down and cry. I know however that that is what I should be doing first and then things will work out. And who knows, this hectic life that I am leading is possibly training for becoming the woman Heavenly Father has planned for me to become.

So many times I find myself feeling so intimidated by the thought of spiritual growth and development. My spirit aches for it and I try to fill the need while being held back by my huge fear of the weakness that comes before becoming stronger. I know that I am a strong woman who has had a lot of life experience. I have made it through so many things that have turned out to be huge tutorials with heavenly father. But Sister, the subject for the most recent tutorial has been quite the challenge for me. It is something that you learned to do on your mission and it is something that you will not be surprised is a struggle for me. The most recent topic of study has been the need for me to surrender control of my life and be humble and patient.

I know that it will be a huge step for me and a great thing for me to learn! I only hope that I can actually get it through my thick skull the first time! I miss you quite a bit and grew way to accustomed to having you right down the hall when I needed support! I am so grateful for the way your have cared for me and loved me and helped to shape me into who I am today. I know that Heavenly Father has answered many of my prayers through my wonderful big sister. I have so many wonderful recent memories of you sitting next to me when I needed a hand to hold or just listening as I bawled my eyes out and telling you my latest trouble! I haven't always shown it but I've always looked up to you. Remember the story mom tells of when she took us to get our picture taken and I bawled and bawled until my big sister held me? Some times I still feel that way. All I want is for my big sister to be there and to know that she is behind me and proud of me. Thank you! I love you and don't know what I would do without you! Good night!

Love,
Your Little Sister